What To Do With Myself

I can't believe it.  Both of my kids are asleep before 10pm, Hubby doesn't get home from work 'til midnight, and I don't know what to do with myself.  These nights are few and very far between.  Usually if I can get both kids to sleep at a decent hour I go straight to bed with them because I'm exhausted, but tonight I'm wide awake.  I spent 15 minutes picking up the house, I started a Hash brown Casserole in the crock pot, and now I'm going to get my work done peacefully.  Lately just mentioning the word "work" has me racing like a mad woman to type up some jobs on my phone before the midnight deadline hits.  I'll actually be ahead for once!

Once my work is finished I'm going to see if I can't list a few things online to make some extra cash.  I really need to get my handmade gifts site up and running again, but with the baby it's been impossible.  I've been making a few bows and diaper cakes here and there that I've been listening on a few auction sites, but I need to do more.  I may see if I can sell books at becksbooks.com because I have a few textbooks sitting in the closet from classes I've taken over the years. Hubby is going back to school next semester thanks to his new job, so we'll have even more textbooks to buy and then hopefully sell over the next couple of years.  I'd like to make a bit of cash back on the purchases we'll have to make, so I might see how well selling my old ones go first.

Anywho, my list is now made, so I'm going to hop off here and see how much I can get done before Hubby gets home.  Maybe I can even enjoy a glass of wine and a show off the DVR if I hurry!

Dreaming Of Fall Weather

Where did this beautiful cool night breeze come from?  After all the heat we've dealt with lately it's such treat.  I'm sitting here with my office window open and the a/c off wishing Fall was here already.  I have to remind myself this is just a tease, and I'll have to wait a few more weeks for that.

I can't wait for Fall to arrive, though.  It's a busy time of the year for us, but it's when I'm the happiest.  Our anniversary lands on the last day of Summer, and we did that on purpose.  We wanted to start each new year of marriage with a fresh season.  We'll be celebrating anniversary #9 this year followed 4 weeks later by Ellie's 3rd birthday.  It doesn't seem like my baby should be 3 years old yet!  We'll yet again celebrate at Duke Power rec beach where we can grill out and sit around the outdoor fireplaces in the cool, but not too cool, October air. It's my favorite time of year.

A couple weeks later I'll probably freak a bit when I turn the big 3-1.  I have a feeling 31 is going to be harder for me than hitting 30 was.  30 was like the cusp, and 31 means I definitely can't deny I'm into my 30s  now.  I can't hide that from myself, but I'll soon get over it as Thanksgiving approaches, and Christmas.  Yep, I absolutely love that time of the year, and I can't wait for it to arrive.

The Truck Situation

*Takes a deep breath*  It’s all going to be ok.  The dealership has gone above and beyond, and everything will be taken care of.  It’s not time to break out the arturo fuente cigars just yet because the tranny shop can't get to the truck until next Monday, but it's all being taken care of. That's all that matters, right? My beautiful new truck gets to sit in my driveway for another week while I'm still stuck driving my Dad's Jeep for now, but at least when I do finally get to drive it everything will be working properly. It's worth the wait.

The other good news is I called the dealership to see if any warranty replacements had ever been done on this particular truck, and I found out the fuel injectors along with most of the rest of the fuel system was replaced 20,000 miles ago.  Considering the fuel injectors are the #1 issue on these trucks that’s a major relief. 

Bottomless Pit

I don’t know why, but I’m so hungry tonight!  I’ve been eating everything in sight, and I still feel like a bottomless pit.  To top it all off Ben and I just cleaned 4 episodes of Deadliest Catch off the DVR, and now I’m totally craving king crab legs.  Of course there’s no where open to get any at this time of the night, and I wouldn’t go blowing money on crab legs right now anyway no matter how absolutely heavenly they are.  I guess I’ll go make myself a salad and throw in some of the imitation crab meat I have in the fridge right now.  It’s not king crab legs, but it’ll have to do.  I hope my stomach forgives me for trying to trick it with the fake stuff! LOL!

New Truck…Broke Truck

If you were to ask me what’s been going on lately I’d ask you how much time you’ve got to listen.  We’ve been busy dealing with all of our vehicles breaking down at once, Ben’s work having downtime between finishing one house and starting a new one, birthday parties, and new babies coming into this world in droves (too bad none of them are mine to keep).  Yeah, it’s been quite busy around here.  Then yesterday we spent all day at the dealership purchasing our *new to us* truck.  All this running around has me worn out, and I wish I had a huge bean bag to melt into. I may have to get a couple for the play room now that Ellie is big enough.

Today was spent yet again dealing with the new truck because there’s 1 last thing the dealership has to fix on it.  Ben got to drive it home yesterday, but the truck started messing up again on the way home.  Just what you want from a truck you just purchased, right?  It’s a used truck, but the problem had been fixed and the truck was working fine again.  Everything checked out, and the test drive went great.  I thought I was going to cry when it started giving us problems less than 2 hours after we drove it off the lot, but even though we bought the truck “as is” (we couldn’t get a warranty with the oversized tires) the dealership is going above and beyond to fix the problem, a faulty solenoid, for us.  I have to give them major props for what they’ve done.  They could’ve said “sorry, it started happening after you bought it, so you’re SOL”, but they said “we’ll get that taken care of”.  Ben drove Daddy’s Jeep to work today, and the dealership sent a tow truck all the way out here… 37 miles away from the dealership… to pick it up and have the solenoid replaced for us!  Hopefully we’ll be getting the truck back for good tomorrow, and we’ll finally be able to celebrate our new much needed purchase.

Sick Of The Drama

I’m so sick of all the family drama going on around me.  I always suspected there would be a few of them that would want to argue over inheritances when my Grandparents passed away, but I never suspected it would be happening now while both of my Grandparents are very much alive and healthy.  I feel like one family member in particular is standing there with a Funeral planning worksheet hoping something will happen to my Grandparents, and it makes me sick. Why do people have to be like that?  I think your family should be more important than any material thing, and that’s why I would rather not inherit anything.  Material items and money do nothing but make people crazy.

Family Drama

I’ve had so much going on this week, and it’s really stressing me out.  I know we all deal with crazy family members from time to time, but this week has been one thing after another for me.  I don’t feel comfortable sharing the details, but sometimes I really wish I could take a very extended break from my family.  Unfortunately it’s not really an option for us because we’re surrounded by them.  We don’t have the option to move right now to get away from all the bs that’s going on, so we have to deal with it.  That’s hard to do in a situation like what’s been going on lately. 

Sometimes I even wonder how I even came from the same genes as some of these people.  They’re petty, and most of them aren’t happy unless they’ve got some kind of drama going on.  I get stuck in the middle not because I want to but because they drag me into it, and I’m sick of it.  No matter how much I try to avoid it I know things like this will continue to happen until we can finally afford to buy some land and build a house of our own.  The catch 22 is we can’t save up to do that if we don’t live here in a home owned by family that’s rent free.  Sometimes I think throwing our home ownership dreams out the window and finding a place to rent would be totally worth it if it would get us away from this mess, though!

*Sigh* One day we’ll get away from it all.  One day I won’t have to deal with people knocking on my door in the middle of the night and waking the little one to moan and complain about something one of the others did to them.  One day I won’t feel constantly belittled around my family because I won’t be around them anymore.  One day I won’t have to listen to someone tell me I’m a horrible mother because my daughter is in serious need of a nap, pitching a hissy fit, and that person won’t leave so I can get her to sleep!  UGH!

A Distracted Mind

My mind has been everywhere but where it should be lately.  Lately I find myself becoming more and more distracted when I sit down at my pc.  Maybe that’s because I’ve had less and less “quiet time” to get things done and relax a bit while the little one naps.  Maybe it’s because I’ve got a touch of Spring Fever (except for dreary days like today), and I’d much rather be outside enjoying the sunshine than inside working.  Then there’s the fact that there’s just so much going on in the online world it’s easy to get distracted. 

On of the “jobs” I do online involves a bit of ghostwriting.  One of my deadlines was that I needed to have 1000 words written by noon today.  My procrastination gene kicked in full force, and I finished around 11am this morning.  Every single time I would sit down to write something else would grab my attention whether it would be Hubby walking in and asking me to do something, the little one whining because she didn’t have my full attention, or (during quiet time) my mind wandering.  I’ll just check my Facebook.  I’ll only be on there a minute…

an hour later…

I MUST write now.  2 sentences…3 sentences…a Draw Something request?  I guess I can break for that!

This is how things have been going lately.  Then there are the times I head to Google to do some research about something I need to write.  I often get distracted by search engines as well.  Ooh, this website with Ripped Freak reviews seems interesting. I wonder if they have any photos?

And there goes my mind again!  I’ve got to figure out a new routine, something that will keep me motivated to write, something that keeps my mind from wandering too much.  I do believe I’ll start shutting my cell phone and wifi off while I write and turn it back on when I need to research or submit my work!

Sidetracked

Where are those reviews I promised?  I’m still working on them. :-(.  I know I promised to get them up, but I got sidetracked.  I had a big web design project to finish up this week, and I’ve spent a lot of time designing, fixing issues, coding, getting frustrated, and collapsing into my bed from utter mental exhaustion. 

Hubby has been at the shop up at the pasture during most of his free time this week milling lumber to cure and building me some new furniture, so I haven’t had much help around the house.  When I haven’t been working I’ve been dealing with a cranky teething toddler (yay she’s cutting that last set of molars, and it’s almost over!), and trying to keep up with the housework.  Yeah, that hasn’t been going so well.  The house is still a complete wreck, but I’m not worried about it.  I’m just happy Hubby is finally getting around to making me that new bed he promised me years ago!  He's ordering custom mattress this week, and the frame should be done by the end of the week, too.  You don’t know how excited that makes me!

Anywho, I’m mostly done with the big project, so I’m going to try to get started on the rest of those reviews this week.  I want to get them up soon so ya’ll can start checking out some awesome handmade shops!

A Wee Bit Chilly

Brrr!  It’s not as cold as it has been, but I’m freezing today.  Even under 2 blankets I’m still shivering!  I think a big bowl of hot soup would do me some good right now, but I’m so cold I don’t want to crawl out from under my blankets to make any.  Hopefully if I sit here for a bit and think about warm things I might not feel chilled to the bone anymore.  Let’s see…pool cabanas, sipping a drink on the beach with warm sand between my toes, bathing suit weather...I think I'm starting to feel a teensy bit warmer already!

Planning Goals for 2012

With the new year comes new goals I've setting forth to attempt to accomplish. I've never been one for making resolutions because I most likely give up after the second or third week and feel like utter crap for doing so. I will never, and I mean never make a resolution involving weight loss because it just won't work.

Instead I make a list of goals I would like to accomplish throughout the year, sort of a bucket list of sorts for that specific year.  If I completely my list, great!  It's great if I complete my list, but if I don't I won't fret over it.  The goals aren't set in stone, and the list is more of a guide for me.  It's a place I can add things I would like to do, and whenever I get some free time or money I can refer to the list for something I can get done.

For instance I have a few pieces of furniture I would like to sand and refinish.  I know I can't do it anytime soon because I just don't have the time or money right now, but I can add those to the list.  Then later on in the year I may be able to mark that off.  The top item on my list right now is reorganizing my entire house and getting rid of many things I've held onto that we have no use for or room to house anymore.  I've tried the "30 days to..." type things, and they never work for me.  I always get sidetracked half way through and stop.  Instead I'm making a note to sort through something each day as I have time whether it be an entire room or just one box.  That I can handle.

Do you make resolutions?  What about goals for the year?

What A Week!

Normally I can blame my depressed mood and insomnia on my Thyroid imbalance, but this week it has been caused by pure stress.  When I’m stressed I get depressed, and when I’m depressed I just can’t sleep.  I’ve been dealing with this a lot with the whole job hunt issue.  Ben still hasn’t found a job (he’s got an interview in the morning so cross your fingers!), and my own job hunt has turned up nothing. 

To top it off someone knocked on the door at 9:30am, and Ben opened the door to find a cop asking for me.  I freaked out wondering what the heck a cop would want with me.  He was serving me papers…from a debt collection company…for a debt I paid off years ago.  Of course that stressed me out to the max because I thought I had let something slip through the cracks completely forgetting to pay it.  I pulled out my records, and I have receipts showing that debt paid in full.  It’s just some random junk debt buyer trying to scare me into paying something I’ve already paid.  As I’ve got the receipts it’s a pretty cut and dry case, so I’m not too worried about it now.  Yesterday, it did add to the stress, though.

Then I sat down to blog last night, and the O key on my netbook broke off the keyboard.  I hit the key, and one of the plastic clips on the bottom of it snapped right now.  Just great!  I popped the zero key off and stuck it in the O’s place because I just can’t do without my O key.  It’s practically impossible not to use it!  See, three O’s in that sentence alone!  I can still use the zero key, but I’m hitting the little rubber connection underneath, not an actual key.  I’ll have to do some more rearranging, find another key I hardly ever use to replace it, and I’ll just have to live with a weird looking jacked up keyboard for now.  I doubt I can find a replacement letter, and even if I could I couldn’t afford to buy it right now!

Finding A Few Minutes To Blog

I've been kind of quiet on all my blogs this week, but it's for good reason.  Boy do I feel like I've hardly had a moment to sit down.  The little one went to stay with my aunt for a little while this afternoon so I can get some things accomplished that are hard to do with her here.  I've been trying to write Thank You Notes to all the party guests who brought her birthday presents, but it's hard to do when you've got a 2 year old that likes to snatch your pen away and beg you to draw kitties!

Anywho I just wanted to pop in and say I'm not dead. I'm still around even if I'm a bit quiet these days. Sometimes it's just hard to find time to blog.

Yummy Temptations

I’m going shopping tomorrow with my best friend for her new tv, so I’ve been wasting time tonight by sitting here looking at samsung tvs. You know what the problem with wasting time is? It makes me hungry, and when I'm hungry at nearly midnight that is not a good thing. I ended up consuming a whole cajun turkey sandwich and half a bag of BBQ Baked Lays.

That’s also why I don’t like to keep junk food in the house.  If it’s not here it can’t tempt me into eating it!  Oh, and I don’t care if they’re “Baked” Lays.  They’re still fattening potato chips!  It’s Ben’s fault.  He bought them to go with his lunch today at work, and he brought what he didn’t eat home.  Shame on him for tempting me! LOL.  Seriously though.  It’s no wonder I’ve gained 11 pounds in the last month.  If I don’t stop eating like a horse I’ll be as big as one by the end of the year!

A Complete Failure

It seems the more I try to fix the things that are going wrong in my life the more things go wrong.  Really the only thing that has gone right lately was Ben finally finding a job.  This week has been particularly stressful because I’ve been at odds with my family.  As much as I try to fit in, I don’t, and it leads to major issues.  It’s not like I’m this wild rebellious person.  I just have different views on the world, and I do things differently.  I don’t hide in a corner scared at the least little thing.  I get out there and do things, and if I fall on my face oh well.  At least I tried.  Apparently it’s wrong of me to try new things.

For instance I’ve been working on starting up a new business, and my family knows it.  A few days ago a group of family members sat me down and tried to tell me I was wasting my time and money because no one would ever be interested in buying my product.  I’m just not the type of person who succeeds, so it would all blow up in my face. 

What kind of people say that to someone they supposedly love and support?  I definitely don’t have their support in anything, and most of the time I feel like I don’t have their love either.  Yesterday evening I was rearranging stuff in the attic making more room to store Ellie’s baby clothes that no longer fits when I came across a box that my Grandma must have left behind without realizing it.  It was tucked back in a corner on the far end of the attic, so I’m sure she never ventured that far when they left this house 18 years ago.

Of course I was nosey and opened the box to see what was in it.  There were trophies and awards my aunt earned in hair competitions, My mom's bowling trophies, and all kinds of things showing the accomplishments of her children.  She encouraged them to try their best, yet she and my mom both seem to go out of their way to tell me I’m going to fail at anything I do.  Memories of my childhood came flooding back, and I remembered many other times I was told not to do something because I would always fail.  There was the time I wanted to take piano lessons, and my Mom said I’d never stick with it so she wouldn’t let me.  Then there was college.  I had my heart set on one career, but both of them went on and on about how I couldn’t do it.  They finally wore me down until I chose the career choice they felt was best for me, and ya know what?  I hated it, and I dropped out of college because I couldn’t stand it.

I sat there wondering how they could justify acting that way and telling me I would fail without giving me a chance.  I’ve never been a quitter.  When I try something I try hard, and I do my best to succeed.  If after giving it my all I fail that’s different.  I tried, and I’m proud of myself for trying.  I will never tell my daughter she can’t do something.  I will always make sure she knows I believe she can do anything she sets her mind to, and no matter what the end result may be I will ALWAYS be proud of her for at least giving it a try.

Sweating It Off

If you’ve been looking for good fat burners, but you don't have a lot of money to spend I have a solution. After running around my house cleaning like a mad woman while the AC is broken I feel like I've lost at least half of the 7 lbs I've packed on over the last 2 months lol. I'm seriously sweating like a pig wrapped in a blanket on 4th of July!

Most of my house is clean now, though.  I still have massive piles of laundry to finish, and while the current load is going I’m going to sit here in front of the AC soaking up what little bit of cool air it’s putting out.  We can add recharging the AC to our list of things we need money for!

Speaking of money, Ben finally got some good news about a potential job.  He doesn’t have the job just yet, but after a short interview and a glance over his resume the potential boss told Ben to call him back on Monday, and he may have a spot open for him.  It’s a residential construction job, and since they’re starting the framing on the new house he may have room for an extra hand, but he needed to go home and crunch the numbers to make sure.  Pray, cross your fingers, and plead that the guy can add him to his crew.  With the unemployment rate in our county jumping to 11.4% this month it’s getting even harder to find a job, especially in construction, and we really need him to land something soon.

Scan Your Way To Healthy Eating

After walking through the grocery store playing with the weight loss app I downloaded for my phone I discovered I wasted twice as much time shopping as I normally do.  Who knew a barcode scanner could be so much fun?

My friend signed up for Weight Watchers recently, and since she knows Ben is trying to lose weight she has been trying to convince me to convince him to sign up for Weight Watchers.  Honestly I think it would do him some good, but I’ve had a hard time convincing him it’s not just something women do, and it really can help him lose weight by teaching him how to choose healthy foods.  I finally got him past the ‘it’s for women” thing, and after my friend showed him how the program works he’s actually interested now.  His only excuse now is that he thinks it would be too hard and too time consuming to figure up the points.

When I spotted the WW ScanCalc Android app I decided to give it a try.  I thought it might help him when he’s shopping alone to make better choices, and it might help me buy healthier choices not just for him but for the whole family.  The truth is it does help to figure up the point values faster.  We can’t actually figure up his daily points until he signs up, but it’s proven to him that it won’t always be a pain to figure everything up.  The only downsides I see are it doesn’t calculate most store brands, and that it doesn’t keep a list of items you’ve scanned, so unless you write it down you’ll have to scan items again as you eat them.  Also, I wish it gave a list of meats, etc, that aren’t labeled with UPC codes.

For a free app it’s a great start, though.  When Ben signs up for Weight Watchers we’ll probably move on to one of the paid apps or use this one in conjunction with one of the others. For now it’s a great time waster.  I had way too much fun running around my kitchen scanning everything and walking up and down the isles at the grocery store randomly scanning items! 

Coming Or Going

I've had so much going on lately half the time I don't know whether I'm coming or going.  With the middle of Summer upon us a lot of family members have been going on various vacations, and we have become to go to house watchers/ pet sitters for everyone.  Last week we were taking care of my Dad's farm, his house, and his gardens (which are all spread out over 3 different locations) while watering flowers for a little old lady we know and taking care of pets for another family.  It takes a minimum of 3 hours just to take care of my Dad's stuff, so we spent every evening running back and forth from place to place doing all that while Ben was also in the middle of fixing our one and only vehicle.  Thankfully my Dad left us his truck for the week, so we used it to do our running around and Ben came home from feeding and gardening to work well into the night hours quite a few days to get the Blazer fixed. 

Yeah I'd say we're definitely ready for a break.  We were going to go down to our friend's condo at the beach this weekend, but I don't think we'll be making it.  Next weekend it's booked by another friend, and the weekend after that we have to be here for a wedding.  Maybe we can make it down at the end of the month or the beginning of September!

Volcanoes Erupting On Mount Jenn’s Face

Today has been a very blah kind of day for me.  I’ve had one of those days when I just didn’t want to leave the house because my self esteem was at rock bottom.  I’ve always struggled with my self esteem, but over the years I’ve learned to embrace the person that I am inside and out…most of the time.  It doesn’t matter how hard I try to remind myself of this my self esteem hits rock bottom when that “time of the month” rolls around.  Actually it’s usually the week before when my hormones start to go haywire.  My face breaks out in a gazillion pimples, and I’m not talking little red dots either.  We’re talking massive volcanoes erupting everywhere.  Combine the one that popped up this morning that has half my cheek swollen with the bloating that's making me feel super fat and ready to pop a handful of apidexin, and I really didn't feel like going anywhere.

I finally did drag myself out of the house this evening.  My poor mood meant I didn’t feel like cooking at all (and who wants to stand over a hot stove in this heat?), so we did a quick drive thru dinner and stopped by Walmart.  I had to pick up a few things to finish a diaper cake I’m making for a baby shower on Sunday.  Let’s just hope this zit with it’s own zip code decides to subside by then!  I generously applied some Zip Zapper to it, and it’s looking better already.  If don’t know what Zip Zapper is you’re totally missing out.  Since it’s only $1 (as with most other E.L.F. products) I decided to give it a try because it’s not much cash to lose if it didn’t work.  I’m totally in love with this product!  It’s the only thing that’s helped me lately, and I ended up ordering 3 more to have plenty on hand at all times!  I’m almost out of mineral foundation, so when I put in an order in the very near future I’ll definitely have to order a few more of those babies!

The Art Of Wearing Jewelry

Most women are ecstatic to receive a new piece of jewelry, but I admit I’ve never really been a big jewelry wearer.  Most of that comes from the fact that my mom didn’t wear much jewelry, and the church we grew up in taught that wearing jewelry and makeup to enhance the appearance was wrong.  Sometimes I wonder if I would feel differently about wearing jewelry if I hadn’t been raised this way.  Sometimes I feel uncomfortable if I wear jewelry because it’s not normal for me. It's not an everyday part of my wardrobe, and it's something that I was taught should only be worn on special occasions. I don't agree with that, but since I was never taught how to properly accessorize I feel weird when I do try.

There are times I do wear jewelry, though.  I have an opal necklace that I love to wear on special occasions, and I’ve been eyeing a ring with black diamonds that I would love to have. If I could afford that ring I would wear it all the time because I love it that much, and that's saying a lot for someone like me. I don't even wear my wedding ring most of the time!